S02E03 Unveiling Unconscious Patterns & Hidden Power Through Self Awareness

In this excerpt from Season 2 #fearlesslycuriouspodcast I'm sharing a clip from a Private Coaching Session with a client who's revamping their online presence as we build together the framework for their new entrepreneurial journey.

In this clip my client shares their internal struggle with self-doubt and fear of judgment in life especially when posting on social media. 

The importance of authenticity and self-expression is emphasized. I encourage my client to post content that brings joy rather than conforming to social expectations.

 I suggest how to deal with negative self-talk, such as acknowledging and logging doubts to understand and overcome them. 

Human design is introduced as a tool to understand your unique traits and to use this knowledge to navigate social media with confidence and a sense of direction. I encourage you to embrace your individuality, dismiss the fear of not being good enough, and to post content that genuinely represents YOU, turning the act of sharing into a joyful and empowering practice.

In every coaching session, the aim is not just to share and discuss but to suggest strategies for clients to honour their needs in this case to be seen and recognised for their authenticity.

After all what makes your business and you stand out in a sea of compeition is what no one can compete with - your Unique personality and vision.

Resources:

Join my fearlessly curious community and SIGN UP to my Fearlessly Authentic Living Newsletters for real client success stories and life strategies, reflections, contemplations and support you won't find anywhere else.

If you enjoy this episode, please SHARE, RATE and REVIEW the show on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.

About Me:

I help you lead with fearless authenticity by smashing the self-imposed heteronormative stereotypes that keep you playing small through emotional healing inner child and inherited intergenerational trauma. Create a purposeful life of your unique design by disrupting societal norms and expectations of who you should be. Explore mindfulness, fearless curiosity and loving kindness

Resources:

Join my fearlessly curious community and SIGN UP to JOIN my Fearlessly Authentic Living Community Newsletters for real client success stories and life strategies, reflections, contemplations and support you won't find anywhere else.

If you enjoy this episode, please SHARE, RATE and REVIEW the show on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.

About Me:

I help you lead with fearless authenticity by smashing the self-imposed heteronormative stereotypes that keep you playing small through emotional healing inner child and inherited intergenerational trauma.

Create a purposeful life of your unique design by disrupting societal norms and expectations of who you should be.

Explore mindfulness, music, fearless curiosity and loving kindness through the lens of Human Design to thrive as the person you are born to be.

Learn more about my coaching method and join my emotional healing, mindfulness, and music community at melissaindot.com.

Transcript

[00:00:00] Melissa: the first thing I heard you say is that you feel like you're going back to your old patterns.

[00:00:03] Excellent. There's a win because you're noticing it. Because we're not here to NOT get into our patterns. We're here to experience through awareness. There is a perception when we have a desire to commit to our personal development, our personal growth, there's an unconscious desire to be perfect.

[00:00:27] We're not AI, we're not robots. We are here to experience. The fact that you're aware of that is a freaking win because you can now choose to go into your pattern and be aware I am in my pattern every step of the way oh, look, I'm doing my doom scrolling.

[00:00:47] That is a win. That is not a failure in any stretch of the imagination . Wouldn't that be a weird twist of events, right? If by tuning into what you once perceived as your unhealthy habit, because now you're aware that is the difference, it's no longer the same experience. 

[00:01:09] When that happens again, and it will, you can make a conscious decision. 

[00:01:17] By having that awareness, you can get clear whether or not you, you're actually frustrated because what, what are you feeling? Are you feeling frustration or are you just simply aware?

[00:01:27] Client: To some extent I'm frustrated because I feel I'm wasting time

[00:01:31] Melissa: Let's see where that frustration stem from because frustration happens when you are basically living from your mind. Is your mind telling you something? And you're getting frustrated with your mind.

[00:01:44] Client: I think my mind is very addicted to the dopamine hits. I know I'm caught in that loop, that addiction loop.

[00:01:51] Melissa: Do you not think that you are in process of stopping it? 

[00:01:56] Perhaps there's a opportunity for you to give yourself some compassion there. Notice that's something to celebrate because life is not about all or nothing as much as we like it to be. When this happens again, and you do feel frustrated, you are letting your mind lead you to the doom scrolling. So what prompt, what strategy could you create as an intervention for when that happens? So here are the prompts, right? Am I feeling frustrated?

[00:02:26] Yes. Okay. Simple maths. If I'm feeling frustrated, I am in my not self. Okay. I'm walking you through this. So if I'm in my not self, it's because I'm not employing my strategy. My strategy is to respond. Where am I emotionally? Right. And if you're not clear where you are emotionally, Then you know you're in your mind.

[00:02:50] So then you can speak to your mind. This is my mind functioning.

[00:02:54] How can I respond emotionally? This is my discomfort. The discomfort is my power. I'm just gonna let the mind do its thing. Maybe I might journal, ask my mind, why do you wanna doom scroll? What is it that you're looking for? Let's get clear. Let's look for something specific .

[00:03:12] See how you can now activate the channel of discovery, because now you, you can focus on that. Mind, you wanna take me there? Can we look for something specific? Then you leverage on that as opposed to allowing the mind to take all the power. 

Navigating Social Media Habits with Self-Awareness & Compassion

[00:03:27] Client: Why Am I looking at social media again?

[00:03:29] Melissa: Another question might be, am I just bored? 

[00:03:33] Client: Which honestly, I say is 70% of the time

[00:03:36] Melissa: I'm wondering right now whether this is not a doom scrolling anymore, because there is nothing that you have to do.

[00:03:45] And there's a part of you that desired this, you wanted to be free, you wanted to do nothing. Is this a part of you now that is judging you? Criticizing you from an old place. It's no longer relevant where now you can say, actually, I'm not doom scrolling because there's nothing else I want to do right now.

[00:04:07] I'm choosing to be here and to scroll without any other intention, but to scroll. So I'm not going to call it doom scrolling anymore because I'm not procrastinating . With awareness, I'm just going to say, you know, I'm going to give myself half an hour and then I'm going to go and clear the room.

[00:04:23] I'm going to satisfy this because this is what I desired. I desire to have the freedom.

[00:04:28] Client: You're right, I never thought of it that way.

[00:04:31] Melissa: There is no urgency to do anything else right now. And this is what you were looking forward to.

[00:04:34] Awareness is NOT going, Hey, red flag, red flag, red flag, red flag. I set myself this standard at that time when I did have other things to do and I was procrastinating, sleeping late

[00:04:46] and so waking up late and rushing. I'm not in that space anymore. Can I recalibrate,

[00:04:52] set the timer so you have an awareness. Oh, I've been on half an hour. Not because you want to punish yourself or even restrict yourself. Just support your journey of awareness and if you really want it to be purposeful, start noticing your patterns as they develop.

[00:05:12] Now I see this pattern every day around this time. I'm like doing this. You wouldn't have known that unless you tracked it.